Incredibly Biased Star Wars Review

12/29/2017

Now that we've all survived the relentless onslaught of Christmas elves, we're about to welcome a new year! I hope you enjoyed my Christmas "story," those of you who are signed up for the mailing list (and if you're not, you can sign up on the bottom-right of this very page)! I also hope that you received your heart's desire from Santa this year, and not your nightmare's greatest fear from Krampus.

In the spirit of providing what people asked for, here's another thing some people requested of me on the blog: reviews. I've tried reviewing some things in the past, but I always feel awkward doing it, because in the end my opinion is only my opinion. Why should it be any more valuable than yours?

Well, I'm going to start sharing what I thought, if only so that you can form a better picture of my aesthetic tastes and what I like, don't like, look for, and try to avoid in stories. If you disagree with me about a work, no problem!

Without further ado, I'm going to start with the most obvious target for a review this season: Star Wars Episode VIII, The Last Jedi.

[Major spoilers follow. I'm sure you've seen Star Wars, because slightly more people have seen that movie than currently reside on Earth, but if you haven't...well, I'm not going out of my way to ruin the movie for you, but I am going to be talking about specific scenes in the movie. Which includes the end. You have been warned.]

I didn't like it.

You can now feel free to skip to the comments and tell me what a terrible or awesome person I am, depending on your position.

I know everyone has a strong opinion about this movie, and I'm no exception. While it had some awesome scenes--the appearance of Yoda, the incredible hyperspace suicide run, and Rey and Kylo Ren fighting together all spring to mind--the impact of each of those scenes is weakened by context.

First off, there was a problem going into this movie: Episode Seven didn't explain to us who the First Order or the Resistance actually are. That was a minor weakness in Seven, but it becomes a huge flaw in Eight, when we don't know what the Resistance is actually fighting for. Or against. Is the First Order a galaxy-spanning super-Empire greater than the Emperor's dreams, or is it a fractured cult using the remnants of the Imperial army for terrorist ends? We don't know.

I know there is an answer, and in fact I know what the answer is because I've read some of the books, but that doesn't help. If the audience has to do their homework in order to answer a basic plot question like "Who is the bad guy and what does he want?" then you've made a mistake.

So that's the foundation on which this movie is built, and it only splinters from there.

We don't know what the good guys or bad guys are after, so we don't know what's at stake on a broad scale. However, we're soon shown what's at stake for the heroes: a First Order fleet is bearing down on the Resistance and will kill all the good guys in one fell swoop. Great! Clear threat, timeline established.

Now we break into three plotlines: Rey trying to convince Luke Skywalker to come back, Finn and Rose trying to stop the First Order from tracking them through hyperspace, and Poe trying to save the fleet from an incompetent and possibly self-serving vice-admiral.

...they all fail. And yet it doesn't matter.

Sure, some of the faceless, nameless members of the Resistance die, but everyone we care about survives. We also still don't know the purpose or scale of the Resistance, so being left with like twenty people is...fine? Did they lose ten people, or two hundred? Or two thousand? Not sure. And what happens if they're destroyed, does the galaxy end? Don't know.

I was left feeling like most of the movie was a waste, like all the heroes could have stayed at home and accomplished the exact same thing (because, in at least one case, that's true). It's a long movie, and it feels long, because no one accomplishes anything.

I could go into specific complaints, but then this post would get really long. So I'll just say that it's a shame where this movie ends, because now I'm not excited to watch Nine.

At the end of Empire Strikes Back, going into Return of the Jedi, we have the following specific questions we want answered:

--What can Luke do as a trained Jedi?
--How will Leia escape?
--How will Han escape the carbonite?
--How will the Rebellion beat the Empire, now that the Empire has demonstrated control even over Rebel allies (Cloud City)?
--How will Luke beat Darth Vader, now that he's demonstrated he can't beat him in a fight?
--How will Luke beat the Emperor, who's even more powerful?

At the end of The Last Jedi, we don't have any of that.

Rey has been Kylo Ren's equal from the very beginning, and has gotten the better of him in every exchange...with zero training. So I have to assume she's going to keep beating him and win with no effort.

The Resistance has lost...some portion...of its membership, so maybe we want to see how the Resistance could possibly beat the First Order. But I still have no sense of the size or purpose of either organization, so as far as I know, the First Order has even fewer ships and people left.

Plus, as far as I know, both organizations are equally to blame for the state of the galaxy. The only explicit villains we see are war profiteers, who sell war materiel to both sides, leaving the Resistance just as culpable for the suffering in the galaxy as the First Order. Why am I rooting for these guys?

This movie has given me nothing to look forward to in the next installment. But I'm obviously going to see it anyway.

It's Star Wars.

-Will

69 Comments

HanShotFirst

12/29/2017 02:45:17 pm

I 100% agree. To me the movie was a diluted version of what it could have been and I think Disney is trying to play it safe with these neutral movies that allow the series to keep expanding at the cost of taking character/story development risks. I feel like once they make their money back on the LucasFilms acquisition then we might see some change and until then it is going to be a series that relies upon past plot devices and safe ride to the finish line. I was kinda hoping both Rey and Kylo would turn to their opposite sides. Ya, the zero training thing seems kinda weak to me as well.

Will link

12/29/2017 02:54:10 pm

It's hard for me to boil down to the most fundamental problems with the movie, because the more I think about it, the more I realize it just doesn't work on any level.

To me, it feels like they're trying to play it safe while pretending to take huge risks. One or the other, Disney.

Jon

12/29/2017 03:01:18 pm

Well said. If only Rey had taken Kylo’s hand I would have thought the film had accomplished something incredibly interesting and intriguing.

12/29/2017 03:07:03 pm

I'm also not sure why Rey DIDN'T take Kylo's offer. It was her most logical option at that point, and the movie gives us no explanation why she shouldn't just join him.

It's like the writers turned down the most plausible character action in favor of the tired old option we all expected, and then said "DIDN'T WE JUST BLOW YOUR MINDS?"

Dragon

12/29/2017 10:18:13 pm

It also completely destroys Rey’s character because she has been talking about the light and hope inside of Kylo Ren for so long and then she completely rejects him.

Nocturniquet

12/30/2017 01:27:11 am

I gave the movie a 5/10 and then made it a 4/10 the next day the more I thought about it.

This movie was hastily written and felt like a filler episode in a cartoon series, not a 200 million dollar blockbuster meant to wow people.

I quite literally would have rather seen a very safe movie where everything is rehashed. They're trying to be edgy without any payoffs or anything substantive.

I honestly would have rather seen Luke Skywalker show up like Superman and 1v200, as ridiculous as that would have been, than to see this movie where nothing happens at all.

It was a 2.5 hour long chase scene where everyone dies except the main characters. It could have literally happened in one hour total, and then we'd have another 90 minutes of something else to watch.

12/30/2017 11:49:03 am

@Nocturniquet

You're describing EXACTLY my opinion after walking out of it for the first time.

I actually used that same comparison: it felt to me like a random episode in the middle of a Star Wars TV show, not a main series movie. I walked into this movie hoping it wouldn't be just a knockoff of Empire, and walked out of it wishing it had been just a knockoff of Empire.

Upon seeing it the second time, I thought it was slightly better than my first impression. If I try to take a more objective position, I'd call it a C or C+, based solely on the strength of the actors and the impact of the handful of awesome scenes.

Still very disappointing for a Star Wars movie made by Disney, where no amount of money is too much. Why are there basic plot mistakes in the main installment of a AAA franchise from a AAA studio?

Kahldrid

2/6/2018 11:00:07 am

Pretty much don't go see the next one! Don't give Disney your money! I mean if there was a plot in the movie.... I couldn't really find it....

Avi

12/29/2017 02:48:21 pm

Well said, without touching on the character assassination of Luke. My opinion has been fluctuating between "good movie with lots of flaws but bad Star Wars" and "depressing teardown of Star Wars in a pretty dress."

One of the elements I have the biggest issue with is the philosophical point of view, which Rian Johnson seems fanatically devoted to: everything old must die for the new to thrive. It's hammered in so hard and it's so frustratingly, demonstrably false. There are so many stories that could be told without burning everything the fans loved about the old characters.

I love Star Wars, but this movie tasted like ash.

12/29/2017 02:53:00 pm

I had this whole paragraph about Luke, but it threatened to take over the whole review, so I cut it.

My real problem with the "everything old must die" theme is that it was not demonstrated well in this movie. It didn't serve the story.

It very well COULD have. Thematically transitioning from "expected Star Wars" to "fresh and new Star Wars" is a great idea, in concept. In practice, they didn't do it: all the same themes are present as in the old movies, just worse.

If Rey had taken Kylo Ren's hand and agreed to join him in exchange for saving her friends, and together they rebuilt a new galaxy out of the ashes of the Empire AND the Rebellion, well now, THAT would have been a bold, new, unexpected step.

But don't pretend you're blazing a bold new trail when you're not.

12/29/2017 02:59:20 pm

Great points. It’s been harder for me to process how I feel about this movie because I WANTED to like it going into the theatre. I keep flipping between the same two stances you do.

I’ll probably see it a third time in the theatre simply to relive those epic scenes that Will mentioned.

And I’ll still see Episode 9. But my expectations are definitely better tempered now.

12/29/2017 03:04:52 pm

I'm probably going to see it a second time tonight, because you basically always have to see a movie a second time to develop a more balanced opinion.

Honestly, I was enjoying TLJ (except for the Finn and Rose storyline) right up until the moment after Kylo extends his hand. Because I assumed everything up to this point in the movie was building up to something.

Then Rey tries to pull her lightsaber and kill him, which...why? That's an underhanded thing to do; why didn't she just refuse? And what motivation did she have for refusing in the first place? It's not like he was asking her to turn to the Dark Side.

But no, she refuses, because the heroes always refuse requests from the bad guys. Not because it makes any sense for her to do so. And then it just keeps going downhill from there until the credits roll.

...I'm sorry, that came out bitter. I'm trying not to be, because in a balanced world, this movie wasn't an F. It was just a...C, C+, with a few A+ moments.

I just want better from Star Wars.

Alex

12/29/2017 02:53:57 pm

i see what you are saying Will, but i disagree. i thought the movie was awesome.

but the reason im here is to say two things

1. you last words in this post sum up what all the people who hate this movie are like "THIS MOVIE IS GARBAGE AND A DISGRACE. i cant wait til star wars nine"

2. join the discord https://discord.gg/YgpDxBD

12/29/2017 03:01:23 pm

See, the problem is, I WISH I couldn't wait until Star Wars IX.

But I'm not excited for it like I want to be. I'm kind of dreading it. I know I'll still go to see it, because it's a popular movie deeply embedded in our culture and also I love Star Wars as a setting, and there's always the hope that JJ Abrams does something cool in the next movie despite The Last Jedi.

...and part of me is sure that they didn't try harder with this movie because they know people will see the next one regardless, and they're not wrong. Which is depressing.

Give me a minute, I'll join the Discord. I'm not really sure how to participate on Discord, though. I've only ever used it to talk while gaming.

12/29/2017 03:17:02 pm

Yay

12/29/2017 03:13:01 pm

We didn't know why the empire was bad in Star Wars, either, until they blew up a planet. I was always willing to accept the opening crawl's word for it though. The First Order blew up another planet in TFA, along with the entire Republic Fleet and the Senate. I have trouble understanding why people don't feel like that's enough demonstration of why they're the bad guys... even when you add in them being slavers who kidnap and brainwash children to be their shock troopers. I guess I can agree they should have given them a puppy-kicking scene in TLJ to help set the scene but isn't not having to do that the whole point of sequels and trilogies? I feel like it's at least a failing of TFA rather than of TLJ.

Without having read any books, I "know" (no research was done to verify my beliefs are strictly Canon - this is what I personally got from watching the movies) that The Resistance was formed as a paramilitary group in opposition to the First Order because the Republic refused to raise a larger standing army or take action against the First Order when the First Order started becoming active in Republic Space, that the First Order are much larger and better equipped than the Resistance and were actually a conventional military threat to the republic even before the events of TFA. Currently, there are more members of the First Order left on the undamaged portion of Snokes Ship (of which maybe a third was destroyed? The actual impact of the hyperspace ram is somewhat overstated by viewers because of how visually striking it was, and how impactful the sound design made it emotionally. But Kylo Ren and Hux are on that ship afterwards as far as I can tell) than there were members of the Resistance at the start of TLJ, and at the start of the film, the implication was that the First Order had multiple forces comparable to this one, or at least represented the largest single cohesive military force active in the known Galaxy (otherwise why would everyone else tolerate them and be too scared to aid the resistance?)

As far as the characters failing... A lot of things that happened didn't drive "the plot" along, but did drive character arcs. It might be weird to think of a Star Wars film as a character-driven rather than plot-driven story, but it seems to have been part of what was intended in TLJ.

Personally, I'm hoping for a decently long timeskip before the next film - time for the First Order to solidify it's control and power structure, time for the Resistance to have gathered new forces, time for Kylo and Rey to have trained new Knights of Ren and Jedi Knights respectively. I'm excited to see what happens with new Force users popping up, now that tales of Jedi masters standing up to oppressors are spreading again and inspiring new believers in the Force to reach out with their feelings.

Tacroy

12/29/2017 07:10:15 pm

> The First Order blew up another planet in TFA, along with the entire Republic Fleet and the Senate. I have trouble understanding why people don't feel like that's enough demonstration of why they're the bad guys...

But that's the point, none of this makes sense.

Imagine you've just finished Return of the Jedi and Leia has created a brand new Republic and everything is all flowers and happiness. Then you roll in to The Force Awakens and basically this happens: https://i.imgur.com/Zki6LEk.gif

It's basically saying "yeah you know that original trilogy you just watched? Apparently literally everyone involved in it is completely incompetent because they never manged to actually beat the Empire, and we're not gonna explain anything."

I mean the First Order is just the Empire except now they've got a new name. They have all the technology, they have all the ships, they have the Storm Troopers, they even have a Death Star for goodness sakes. It's like some child saying "Yeah your Rebels beat my Empire, but I'm gonna make an even better one! With a Death Star that can blow up TWO planets now!"

And all of this happened in the course of a single human lifetime! The Rebels managed to completely fail at government over the course of maybe forty years! This needs some explaining!

I mean personally I blame whoever was in charge of writing the script for TFA. It was so incredibly safe it's not even funny. For some reason they weren't able to write a script unless the "good guys" were in an underdog position, even though it makes absolutely no sense in the context of the previous film. So they just shoehorned it in.

12/29/2017 08:05:56 pm

>But that's the point, none of this makes sense.

>Imagine you've just finished Return of the Jedi and Leia has created a brand new Republic and everything is all flowers and happiness.

If you went in thinking that The Force Awakens was supposed to be set 5 minutes, or even just 5 years, after Return of the Jedi, I guess I can see how that would be confusing, but... Why do you feel like Return of the Jedi happened right before The Force Awakens? I thought it was nice that they didn't try to pretend that 30 years hadn't passed, or that killing the Emperor would have immediately fixed a galaxy where he had dissolved the senate and put his appointed governors and admirals in charge of everything, even if they didn't want to keep the old EU exploration of that. And I don't put 20-30 years of peace in the category of "nothing" or achieving it in the category of "incompetence."

The new trilogy is WWII to the original trilogy's WWI. TFA could have made that more clear but honestly I thought it made plenty of sense.

The last thing I wanted was for the new movies to be entirely about the ways that politics can break down in a post-war society, too. Being overly focused on mundane political intrigue was a big part of why the prequels were so widely panned.

Also, "wait, did that last victory mean nothing?" would also be a totally fair criticism of The Empire Strikes Back, especially since the original wasn't made with a plan for a sequel in mind, but it still manages to be considered the best Star Wars film. And "You beat my Death Star, but now I have a better one!" is also literally the plot of Return of the Jedi - admittedly that's the weakest movie in the OT, but it's still much better than the prequels and the fact that TFA had a weak plot really shouldn't be held against TLJ so much.

Also I rewatched the Despecialized Editions of the Original Trilogy right before the Last Jedi came out - man, those movies were great. I highly recommend going to the trouble to get those editions. All debates about the new movies aside, I love that trilogy and I really think it holds up.

One thing you'll realize if you do rewatch them though is I'm dead serious when I say that you have no reason to believe the Empire is evil before they blow up Alderaan except the opening crawl tells you so, though. Seriously, it just describes them as "the evil Galactic Empire" and you're expected to believe the Rebels are unequivocally the good guys. And you do, because the bad guys look like bad guys, because the leaders of the bad guys act like bad people (they snipe at each other, call their enemies scum, and the really top guys use physical intimidation against their subordinates), and because that's how movies work. I'm not saying it's a totally unfair criticism, or that better explanation definitely wouldn't have helped make the new movies better (I'm torn on that one - not a fan of lengthy exposition), but... it's Star Wars. It's about small bands of heroes who come from nowhere rising up against powerful evil and achieving victory against the odds with the power of space wizards, not about intricate examinations of how the government works and debate about exactly where the line is a government needs to cross before rebelling is justified - or at least, that stuff belongs in the Extended Universe, not the movies.

12/29/2017 08:49:21 pm

>As far as the characters failing... A lot of things that happened didn't drive "the plot" along, but did drive character arcs. It might be weird to think of a Star Wars film as a character-driven rather than plot-driven story, but it seems to have been part of what was intended in TLJ.

This is one of the biggest reasons why critics gave it such generally high reviews, and it baffles me because I thought the character arcs were hands-down the weakest part of the movie.

Not because they played too prominent a role! The opposite, if anything.

The needs of the plot drove the actions of the characters instead of the desires of the characters driving the plot. So we have characters acting against or in spite of their established personalities and motivations just because the plot requires them to.

I actually just got back from seeing it a second time, because I always believe you should see a movie twice to get away from your first impressions. I did like it better the second time, but mainly because the few great scenes were even greater than I remembered.

12/29/2017 10:53:02 pm

I liked it better the second time too, but I also just liked it a lot the first time. I actually specifically liked the character-development plots more the second time, because when I watched it with them in mind I saw a lot more depth to them that I missed the first time around. I'll agree they weren't the strongest aspects of the movie, though.

One note that stood out is that I didn't really get where Rose's comment after intercepting Finn was coming from specifically the first time, because I didn't view his decision to sacrifice himself as a destructive act - but watching it the second time, I caught her expression during his "It felt good sticking it to those guys" comment on Canto Bight, and realized that the destructive urge was something that had actually been written into his character earlier in the film (not sure how consistent is with TFA, need to go back and rewatch that one) and she had picked up on it; and I liked how it hearkened back to Luke's character arc in the original trilogy.

The other thing that hit me harder the second time around was the sound design. I noticed it the first time, but I didn't catch all of it - especially the Kylo Ren / Rey Force conversations. I didn't have any trouble distinguishing when they started the first time, but I knew others did and I couldn't explain the first time around how I knew when they were seeing each other. The second time I realized that it was entirely driven by the ambient sound transition.

I'm curious about which moments you thought were specifically counter to existing characterization. I've heard some from others that I've disagreed with but I don't want to put words in your mouth.

12/30/2017 10:05:38 am

Let's talk about that Finn arc you mentioned, because that's a perfect example of characterization that I'd say flat-out fails.

What you're describing is undoubtedly what the writers tried for, but it wasn't set up in the movie. This isn't who Finn is at the beginning, it's an offhand throwaway line in the middle. We haven't seen Finn acting like this at all.

So we're supposed to see this contrast between Finn's motivation--to hurt the First Order--and Rose's, which is to help the people they're fighting for.

But other than that one scene with the rabbit-horses, this isn't who they are. It wasn't a journey.

We have Finn starting out as willing to abandon a cause to save Rey; that's not someone who is motivated purely to hurt the First Order, it's someone who is trying to look out for those he cares about. He started out as someone who was willing to sacrifice to save the people he loved, never lost that, and during one scene at the end is even shown to be willing to DIE to save his friends, at which point Rose "saves" him with the lesson that we can't be driven by hate.

He wasn't. Never was. It was explicitly shown that he was motivated by saving what he loves all along.

Not to mention all the other things wrong with that arc, like the fact that Finn sacrificing himself to destroy the battering ram laser at the end was EXACTLY the time for a suicide run. Rose saving him was ridiculous meddling on the part of the writers, because at the time, Rose and everyone else is convinced that everyone is 100% going to die unless they blow up that laser. There's no one coming to save them.

So she "saved" him at the cost of what the character has to believe is everyone, including him, inevitably dying minutes later.

12/29/2017 03:14:26 pm

It bugged me SO MUCH that she didn’t just join him and then ask him to stop the barrage. Why wouldn’t you just do it? You literally have nothing to lose. Except for a spot of light and trust in Kylo. For being the ONE character that kept arguing for the redemptive option for Kylo, Rey certainly made a decision that didn’t express her belief.

That was such a wasted opportunity to be bold.

12/30/2017 11:52:00 am

Not to mention that there's no reason for her to act the way she does. Why doesn't she just say no, then turn around and leave? I mean, I don't understand why she says no at all, but if she's going to, surely she has enough of a relationship with Kylo at this point to say "Hey, sorry, I have to go save my friends."

Then if he tries to cut her down from behind, fine, he's the bad guy.

But instead, SHE tries to cut HIM down despite arguing for the good in him just seconds ago. What? Why?

Daniel young

1/15/2018 03:27:10 pm

To me that movie felt like each piece was written and directed by a different person and then Disney just stitched the pieces together into a vaguely coherent story. There were so many moments where I thought they were going in one direction only to turn around and go the other way and then turn around again only to act like nothing in the previous scene happened.

Kaden

12/29/2017 03:23:56 pm

That's the thing though on its own it's a really good film the problem is that it has to compare to the originals which are held in a childhood godlike reverence which is nigh impossible to top and since they have killed off a beloved character every movie. It makes it harder for people to like them. Yes they should expand politics of the plot more but they have given a scale contrary to what Will says. The First order owns a good amount of systems(according to opening credits) and that was the last of the resistance since most of their army was linked to the republic which has been utterly decimated that's was probably the last of their cruisers otherwise Poe wouldn't have tried so hard to save it if they had other ships to fall back on. The only question left to answer is how many more ships does the first order have? Last I counted their were at least 10 ships in the major fight all of which were put out of action and/or destroyed by the suicide jump we have no true scale but I would have to guess the is at least a fourth of their fleet.

Goin off track here a bit but I think that the killing off is a good thing since Hollywood doesn't do that enough in books it is fairly common but when it comes to the movies it's like panning for gold in a depleted river 1 in a million.

You will call me an idiot but I have a challenge before yelling at me say at what age you saw the original movies for the first time and I guarantee it will be under 18 if you are angered with me.

Jacob

12/29/2017 04:38:32 pm

I actually don't think the originals are flawless, in general i think they're kind of boring (episode 4 in particular). But the plot in this one just seemed dead

MidnightDreary

12/29/2017 05:10:49 pm

kaden If the first order has enough ships to take over, control, and garrison most of the galaxy and the resistance is down to like ten people minus children who dream to be resistance fighters how would they win against the first order.

Personal opinion, I am more of a philosophical guy trying to get at and understand the themes of the movies, in my opinion any one of the themes had potential on its own but they handled most of them wrong that left much to be desired and tried to cover it up with jokes(this one they use to often and sometimes takes away from scenes) and stunning visuals( they do great on this aspect i'll give credit were is due).

I see how they did this as quantity over quality, giving us more plots to follow at the expense of the plots themselves. canto bite is the one of the ones I see as very poorly handled and did not even need to be there. For the most part I agree with what Will said it had potential but it did not go really go anywhere and they could have done more by cutting out or changing how thing unfolded.

They could have made they be a spy on the ship notifying where the ship is instead of the first order having the ability to to track the ship in hyperspace. This would have cut out the canto bite bit out and make it into a we need to find the spy or we are DEAD dead making everyone question who to trust. I think you you can use your imagination to think about were that plot could go and how to fix it. for me make rose the spy and because finn was a former member of the first order everyone would be questioning if he's the spy and people like poe would back him up pointing it out that he was unconscious, this would get finn out of being at the wrong end of the blaster and would turn this into poe and finn trying to find the spy and rose would be trying to "help them". some will disagree with me some won't but this is all up to peoples opinions.

final words "the saddest words are 'what could have been' ".

12/29/2017 07:12:05 pm

Honestly I kinda think that there was a spy on the ship in some version of the plot. Admiral Holdo's weird (for Star Wars) adherence to military information compartmentalization protocol only makes sense if they're worried about spies.

kaden

12/30/2017 12:13:06 pm

They win by doing what thousands of smaller forces have done for centuries. By using spies in order to rally troops into a rebellion while the resistance simply provides weapons, vehicles, etc. Or pull a emperor palatine and invade through the ranks. Becoming supreme chancellor of the first order by murdering Kylo Ren in his sleep...

Scott Pike

12/29/2017 06:00:16 pm

Not just the originald, i compared this to all the prequels and except for a few scenes in tlj already mentioned they were all better movies and better star wars movies. The writing was weaker in this. I don't hate it, but mostly didn't enjoy it either.

12/29/2017 09:34:37 pm

>That's the thing though on its own it's a really good film the problem is that it has to compare to the originals which are held in a childhood godlike reverence which is nigh impossible to top and since they have killed off a beloved character every movie. It makes it harder for people to like them.

No, that's not what I'm saying. I don't just think TLJ fails in comparison to the original movies, I think it doesn't work well by any metric.

It wasn't a well-designed or well-supported plot, and (more importantly) characters regularly act against their established personalities and motivations for no other reason than to move the plot forward. I think it's a bad story.

Not a terrible movie, mind you. C, C+. But for a studio with an unlimited budget and a movie that will propel forward a franchise that will make an unlimited amount of money forever, C+ is laughably bad.

Honestly, the main thing propping TLJ up is its reliance on the four preceding superior films (including The Force Awakens, which is not an original Star Wars movie, but which I quite liked). If it hadn't been a Star Wars film, I would have compared it to Jupiter Ascending or Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets: cool-looking, but just a bad movie.

It had a few great highlights, but most of those were moments that relied on Star Wars' long history. Like the Yoda scene. If it wasn't a Star Wars movie, it would have lost a lot of those resonant moments, and gone down a letter grade.

12/29/2017 04:28:24 pm

I agree with most of what you've said, will; my wife and i both left the movie going "it was ok, but something felt off." And i had the same thought, that Poe and Finn/Rose did nothing
But i saw a YouTube review that gave an explanation of why Rey always beats Kylo: because there's more force power available to her. That's also why the siths were always stronger than the Jedi and could take them 2v1 or even 3v1 (duko). Because there were dozens of Jedi, the force was spread out between all of them, while the dark side was split only between master and apprentice. So back to the current movies: after Luke shuts himself off from the force, it raises Rey to match the power of the dark side; and she's the only one utilising the light side. Even though she's untrained, she just has more raw power available to her.

I thought this was a pretty good explanation for it, because i also had a problem with Rey being so unbeatable

midnightdreary

12/29/2017 05:19:14 pm

jacob in my oppinion I disagree the force is basically permiating the entire universe it would make no sense that one person could control the whole force or even a thousand people could. I believe the sith chose the people with a strong connection to the force where as the jedi lets in anyone who is force sensitive in wether weak or strong and not to mention the dark side is very combative and fast in nature but it is also unstable and in the long run will cause problems, just look at Snoke.

12/29/2017 09:40:04 pm

I don't have a problem with that, if it were explained in the movies or if that has ever been how the Force works.

That explanation works for me. If that's how the Force functions, great! But it doesn't seem to be.

For one thing, in the old canon, that's not why the Sith Rule of Two was implemented. There can only be two SITH, not two people using the Dark Side of the Force.

For another thing, Luke Skywalker isn't shown to be more powerful than Darth Vader and the Emperor combined. He's suggested to be on Vader's level and weaker than the Emperor in raw Force strength. Even though at that point he's the only Jedi in the galaxy.

So I don't feel like that explanation holds up, but if they had said it in the movie, I would have been fine with it! I would have accepted any explanation, even Luke staring at her and going "Man, this is crazy, I can't believe she's growing so fast without instruction! I've never heard of such a thing!" thus implying that this is a unique attribute of Rey's.

However, I saw the movie again tonight, and if anything this problem is worse than I thought. The first thing Luke says upon realizing that Rey is a Force-user is "You need a teacher." One of the last things Yoda says to Luke before he dies is "Pass on what you have learned," and he even re-emphasizes that in this movie.

However, Rey gets to be Kylo Ren's level without ever being trained or taught. Thus undermining the repeated fact, in all the movies, that Force-users need to be trained to control their abilities.

Coulamac

2/14/2018 05:37:13 pm

What destroyed it for me was how out of character Yoda was. He’s all about passing on the accumulated wisdom and knowledge of the Jedi. Think how despondent he was when Luke left without finishing his training in Empire. But what does he do in TLJ? He basically says that the Jedi manuals are boring and *destroys* them! He then says that the young folk have all the knowledge they need without training. What??! I know the theme was destroy everything old, but Yoda felt very out of place helping to support that theme.

MomBacca

12/29/2017 06:00:14 pm

You are totally WRONG! The movie was fun!
Love,
Your Mother

12/29/2017 08:50:13 pm

I feel like I should make a Chewbacca noise in response to this.

Philip

12/29/2017 07:51:03 pm

I wish that you could either like the movie or not like the movie and not be put into some kind of camp, like upset fanboy or something. I think that irritated me the most about this movie.

12/29/2017 07:57:09 pm

What irritates me is the “You just didn’t like it because they did something different and you can’t stand that” argument.

No, I wish they HAD done something different. I’m totally down for you flipping Star Wars on its head and blowing my mind, but DO THAT.

1/15/2018 03:34:55 pm

Exactly. Based on the trailers for this I was really hoping the plot would revolve around breaking both these endlessly combative foes and building something new out of the ashes and it seemed like they were building to that until that last scene with ten and kilo where they just basically said you know what nevermind back to the old movies! For almost no explanation at all.

Adarsh

12/29/2017 10:21:56 pm

So quick question about the list, Is it Canon? Are we going to see characters wondering about this stuff in the books?

And are Elven snipers armed with sniper rifles or enchanted longbows?

Now about the movie, I felt that as a movie, it wasn't as bad as people keep saying. However, it did give me a feeling of "So what exactly got accomplished here?" So it wasn't all that great.

12/30/2017 08:55:53 am

Elves always have the highest level of technology available to them. They have to be able to make iPads as well as dollhouses.

But I'm sure a few of them have enchanted longbows, for tradition's sake.

As for the list being canon, the existence of Santa Claus in these universes is not canon. I just thought it was a fun exercise on what they would ask for.

However, you could mine some canon information about what the characters are currently up to based on what they asked for.

As for TLJ, yeah, I have some friends (one friend in particular) for whom this movie is basically Satan's crime against humanity. It ruined Star Wars forever and Rian Johnson should burn for it.

I'm realistic enough to not be in THAT camp. I saw the movie twice, and I'd call it a C+ with a handful of A+ moments. I just think a franchise like Star Wars, with an unlimited budget and a guarantee to make an unlimited amount of money for the next forty years, shouldn't get away with weaknesses like the ones it has.

Rhys

12/30/2017 03:25:08 am

Not going to lie will, i agreed with everything you said apart from liking the hyperspace ram. I think it's a terrifically visually striking scene but it's frankly the most inconsistent thing in the film for me, possibly the entire franchise. If this was possible, why build massive ships that are just targets? Why not just build small shells, fill them with as much mass as possible, stick a hyperspace engine on them, then accelerate them to hyperspace in the direction of whatever you want dead. Why not do this against The death star? Hell why build The death star in the first place? Just accelerate say an asteroid to a hyperspace towards a planet and bang. Job done for much less money. The only reason to have actual ships then is for transport. It breaks the internal consistency of star wars physics so badly as to render the rest of the film's meaningless, it just doesn't make sense from an economics point if view. Phew, sorry for the wall of text

Kurt

12/30/2017 03:39:51 am

You want a movie about space wizards and lasers that go faster than light to have consistent physics? LOL

12/30/2017 05:19:45 am

I don't mind ridiculous physics. I just want consistent rules to that ridiculousness. I love fantasy stories with different rules for the world, but those rules have to be internally consistent else things begin to break down

12/30/2017 08:49:12 am

Rhys, I totally agree. That's what I meant by "each of those scenes was weakened by context."

The hyperspace ramming scene is very cool on its own, and an incredible shot. But its place in the character arc is weakened by the viewer never having a connection to Vice-Admiral Holdo, so her sacrifice means little, and its place in the universe is weakened by the question "If this works, why don't they do this all the time?"

It was the first thing I thought when she started turning her ship around. "Wait a minute, she definitely can't jump to lightspeed. If it worked that way, you could have sent a single hyperdrive-fitted X-Wing against a Star Destroyer and kill it every time, because turbolaser turrets can't track targets at near-lightspeed."

And I'm sure the writers have an answer to that. "It only worked here because of her specific position and because the shields were down and because she held her mouth JUST right," but it wasn't explained in the movie. Which leaves it as a hole.

As for Kurt's comment about physics, I'm with Rhys on this one. It doesn't need to adhere to the laws of physics as we know them--a hyperdrive is already hand-waving physics in the first place--but consistent RULES are necessary for the universe to make sense.

"If this works, why didn't they do it against the Death Star?" isn't a physics question, it's a plot consistency question. This is a storytelling issue, not a science issue.

12/30/2017 09:18:10 am

Ah sorry will, I misread that. You're quite right. What annoyed me the most about it honestly was that Hux and Kylo Ren obviously recognised what she was going to do, given their horrified reactions. Which means this must have been done before, so it can't have been just a one off thing. And then the consistency questions get even more problematic

12/30/2017 09:52:46 am

Oh no, no need to apologize, I was just clarifying what I meant.

And yeah, the reactions of the characters all make it worse. Everyone understands what she's about to do and no one questions what happens after she did it, so clearly this is a known factor for them, but one that has never played into warfare? It's just a weird plot hole.

Again though, I'm sure the writers have an in-universe explanation for it, but we didn't even get a hint of it in the movie. Which leaves it as a hole.

Contrast that to the hyperspace tracking, which they explained clumsily and for over a minute WITH a hologram for illustration, instead of just saying "You see this device? We need to sneak onboard the ship and blow it up." Bam, problem solved, and now you don't have to go through all this technobabble about active tracking and tracking through lightspeed and all that nonsense.

A simpler explanation also would have helped smooth over the reason why they don't tell Holdo. Because in the real movie, they're withholding actual intelligence about the technology of the enemy ship. In this hypothetical version, Holdo knows all this, she just won't approve a risky suicide mission to disable it, but Poe will.

12/30/2017 07:51:30 pm

I understand everyones issues with that scene, and i did also feel some irritation about that since it opens up so many plot holes, but Im just pointing out that a franchise like "Star Wars" does not really run on logical consistency. It runs on more of a "It doesn't have to make sense as long as it's entertaining" mindset.

Also what fool builds a Capitol ship with the main bridge anywhere near the outside of the ship? That should be buried deep within the ship so that it will only get taken out if the ship is toast anyways.
Also, why can't the top-of-the line point defense weapons of a First Order Dreadnaught take out one lone X-Wing?

Star Wars is riddled with so many plot inconsistencies that I've given up on thinking any kind of traditional logic can be applied to it. I just like the movies for the cool action sequences and explosions.

12/30/2017 09:52:05 pm

@Kurt

I hear you, but I don't mind them sacrificing plausibility. They can sacrifice plausible scenarios all they want to; I know I wouldn't be able to hear turbolasers firing in space, but the fight scenes are way more satisfying with sound.

Consistency is all I care about. If everyone is flying around in their X-Wings with the tops down, great, no problem. It's just a movie. But if everybody else is flying around in a sealed cockpit except for one guy who rolls his window down to get a breath of fresh air, THEN we have a problem. All of a sudden there's air in space? Why do they have sealed cockpits at all? What's the point of spaceships?

I know a lot of people see plausibility and consistency as related, but I don't. Why can't a Star Destroyer kill an X-Wing? Because Poe's just that good of a pilot. Is that implausible? Absolutely. Is it inconsistent with Poe's characterization or with the way the story treats him? No. And everybody acts as though this is something an awesome X-Wing pilot could do, so I'm 100% cool with it. The story isn't violated by that.

The story is violated (a little; this wasn't one of my biggest complaints with the movie) by the hyperspace ramming scene because it's all of a sudden possible. I have no issue with the physics of it or the plausibility in the universe. Only with story consistency. If this was possible all along, why wasn't it an option the Resistance considered earlier? Why haven't we seen it in other movies? It's possible sometimes and not other times, and we don't know why, so it's inconsistent.

Hey Will

12/30/2017 03:01:07 pm

I went out and watched the movie before reading this post, and I have to say I 100% agree. In my opinion the script writers seem like they just watched the old movies and wrote out a huge list of Themes and Iconic Messages and Symbols from Star Wars and then tried to hit on every one of those in the movie. A lot of them just seemed way too forced.

Personally I didn't like the Yoda scene in particular. Each trilogy is supposed to be able to stand alone and still be understandable, so who is this creepy goblin guy popping up out of nowhere as a creepy ghost thing?

Also they made Luke a bad guy, which clashes with the coming-of-age savior of the galaxy that was portrayed in the last set of movies.

Also, a lot of the references felt really forced, so much so that it seemed like the characters were sharing an inside joke that they'd have no way of knowing about.

TLDR; the writers spent way too much time trying to appeal to old fans and not enough time actually making a story. They would have been better off just turning one of the many Star Wars novels into the script for the new movie series, and preferably starting with an entirely new cast of characters.

12/30/2017 10:00:03 pm

I certainly had my problems with the movie, but I think I had different problems with it than you did.

Yoda didn't bother me at all. For one thing, Yoda is a major cultural icon. Even people who have never seen Star Wars can identify Yoda, so I don't feel like that would be jarring for anyone. Even if that weren't the case, it's pretty clear in context that this is Luke's master. And that's all you need to know to follow the story.

As for the forcing old themes in to satisfy the fans...I didn't get that impression at all. Like, not a bit. The opposite, if anything. I don't think they were trying to appeal to old fans too hard, or almost at all. Frankly, I thought they would have benefited from taking MORE from the original trilogy, and I never thought I'd say that after VII.

There was only one section where I thought they relied too much on old themes: when Rey doesn't join Kylo Ren. There was no established reason for her to refuse other than "the good guy never accepts a deal from the bad guy." It felt like they were trying to set up a big twist on what you expected from Star Wars, but then gave up and delivered the exact same thing anyway.

12/31/2017 11:24:03 am

Yeah, that scene could have used some reworking. Maybe if Kylo said something like "After we get rid of the rebellion and the first order we will rule the galaxy together" and thus make joining him seem like a betrayal, then her decision would have made sense.

12/31/2017 11:25:02 am

Maybe I'm just not enough of a Star Wars fan to understand things then. I've seen the movies and read some of the books, but I haven't touched the comics or the books pertaining to the new Republic and the First Order and whatnot. So to me as a more casual fan if felt like a lot of stuff was pulled out of nowhere without explanation, such as all these new Force powers, weapons, and hyperspace mechanics (that scene where the lady sacrifices herself to ram the ship into all the First Order ships.)

Also, the way Snoke was killed kind of left me unsatisfied. I had assumed he'd tie in somewhere. Was he Palpatine returned? Was he Palpatines old master? Nope guess he was just some random old sith who popped out of the woodwork as soon as the emperor died.

At least those were my initial impressions. When it comes out on DVD I'll see it again and see if I'm still feeling unsatisfied.

12/31/2017 06:07:31 pm

Not sure if this was mentioned elsewhere about Yoda, but when did force ghosts get the ability to call down lightning? Why did Yoda not do that to Darth Vader or why didn't Obi-wan.

Emperor Palpatine

12/30/2017 06:25:35 pm

Good! Use your aggressive feelings, Will. Let the hate flow through you.

12/30/2017 09:52:50 pm

Teach me, my master.

Frankie Dibbo

12/30/2017 06:31:24 pm

Agree on all points and then some!

Can anyone explain to me why Holdo had to make the 'noble sacrifice' anyway and stay behind? Is there no form of cruise control in the future? To me it seemed like she spent the entire time looking out of the window instead of doing something to help the continued functioning of the ship so there must be some kind of autopilot.

Clint

1/1/2018 09:22:14 am

I Also had that question. I also thought a lot of unnecessary plot could have been switched out of Holdo had been more open with her plans. It seemed like everyone knew what was happening besides the 6 people that started the mutiny.

Gratch

12/30/2017 11:09:24 pm

ERM. So other points that noone mentioned that didn't make much sense:
-Why did Leia have frozen wraith telekinetic around powers which rival most other jedi for their swiftness and accuracy and then not have any other force powers the rest of the 7&8 movies? I mean fine if she trained and got "forced up", but ya know... I'm pretty sure big force powers would have been handy in 20 other places.
-Send 1-2 star destroyers a short lightspeed hop in front of the fleeing ships. They can stop on a dime in front of a planet. Just ploof... come backwards a bit and pen in the rebels.
-When were star destroyers slower than medical frigates? They caught up to the Falcon well enough in episodes 4 and 5.
-Why do space bombers need nonexistent gravity? The tie-bombers in episode 5 propelled out their bombs.
-Why don't shields require fuel/energy as well?

Still liked it better than the prequels, but just seemed to do way too much in service of drama-scenery-stitched-plotting that made no sense from prior SW precedent or character precedent.

12/30/2017 11:24:42 pm

Also to follow up on the hyperspace attack... Yeah... that really needed a qualifier like, "Oh no - she should never do that - it will cause a black hole/space rift/medaclorian splash/etc". Or something along the lines of how that was a 1 in 1000 chance of working because of TechnoBabble. Otherwise everyone would build small mobile ships and fight each other with hyperspace-drones instead of lasers/protons/etc.

Also - golf clap on Rey's intuitive, untrained lightsaber skills being instantly the best in the galaxy for a second movie. Not sure how super force-powered directly translates to super lightsaber skills. Now if she force tossed snokes guards or force tossed stuff into them... maybe. But instead she dueled with them weapon on weapon without any obvious telekinetic actions to support her matching their mastery. Yeah, yeah, she's totes force guided, too bad Luke and every other jedi has had to learn how to wield a sword. Saps.

Jayceblk

12/31/2017 02:21:00 am

Way off topic here, but I wasn't sure where else to put it. I'm even sure it's probably been suggested before but did you ever consider in the future creating an RPG based on Cradle? It almost seems to be the perfect book for it.

RaccoonsloveStarWars

12/31/2017 08:47:07 pm

One of the issues, I had with the movie is Rey's floating power level. In FA, she was more the equal of Kylo due to amazing control but in this movie after a little training about how to access the force she was treated like a weak child by Snoke. I mean if you are going to have be the destined one then use this movie to explain why she is so strong and have her be someone Snoke had to approach carefully.
Most of the bad plotholes, could have been handled so easily with just a couple more lines. Space bombers carry homing bombs that need to get close to avoid Imperial jammers. Light speed jumps are incredibly dangerous as they actually cause an unpredictable tear in space. Anything like that could have fixed some of those issues.

Nitin

1/1/2018 02:58:41 am

I just don't care for Rey, Kylo...or any other new character.

I just don't see the point of Jedi in this new age let alone a nobody like Rey.

RIP Snoke. RIP logic.

Matt

1/1/2018 07:48:45 pm

Hi Will. I've been a fan for a while, but this is the first time I've commented. I'm sorry you didn't like the new Star Wars, but I didn't even see it because I thought The Force Awakens was absolute garbage. As a huge fan of Star Wars that can quote large sections of the first movies verbatim and as someone who has read a lot of the expanded universe, I was seething when I came out of The Force Awakens (TFA). I'm going to spoil some plot points from TFA, so if you're one of the three people that hasn't seen it twice yet, stop reading here.

I'm ignoring the fact that TFA was a remake/mashup of A New Hope and The Empire Strikes Back, almost scene for scene in places - not just clever callbacks that hardcore fans would appreciate, but a scene for scene remake. Even ignoring that, it was STILL bad. 'Let's have another big bad weapon that destroys planets, we just have to make it even bigger and badder than the first two Death Stars (and call it something even cooler). But how?! Let's have it drain a star to obtain the energy it needs to destroy a planet! What a great idea. Then we can call it Starkiller. But wait. Why do we need to destroy the planet if we've just drained the sun? The planet is already dead.' Stupid. To get around that little mistake, they had to make the weapon be able to shoot it's death ray/laser beam/ultimate fire of destruction across the galaxy instantaneously (rather than at say, the speed of light), which completely violates the established laws of the Star Wars universe. Whoops. (And who else got angry/realized how stupid it was when everyone looked up and saw center of the Republic explode, like it was a moon of the planet they were on or something and not halfway across the galaxy. Here's how the Creative Executive on TFA actually explained it: "Some weird-ass hyperspace-rip seen-across-the-cosmos kinda shit" . . . Brilliant). I think they screwed up, then just said something on the order of "the beam travels in hyperspace, and the light from the explosion caused by the beam travels in hyperspace too. It's science fiction!" Yeah, but it's not smart science fiction. It's bad writing.

Then, Rey suddenly becomes a master of the Force about two hours after she learns the Force exists and uses it to alter the minds of her guards so she can escape - lazy writing. Then, in the lightsaber battle with Kylo Ren, Finn is going blade to blade with him. Except we know from the beginning of the movie that Kylo Ren can freeze and hold people with the Force. So why doesn't he just freeze Finn and chop his head off? Whoops. They must have forgotten they gave the baddie that power, and now it looks stupid when he doesn't use it. Those are just a few of the more egregious examples that stood out to me. I've heard other fans trying to offer explanations/rationalizations for some of these problems (Rey was figuring out her Jedi heritage and decided to try something she'd heard tell of and, hey presto! it worked, or Kylo Ren was too tired/too wounded/too proud/a combination of all three to use the Force on Finn), but that doesn't happen in a good movie. In good movies, fans absolutely try to figure out obscure plot details and determine the direction the movies will go, but not explain away mistakes/things that don't make sense.

From everything I saw in the first movie and gather from the second movie, the Empire (oh, excuse me, New Order), led by a mysterious dark master of the Force and his apprentice, has destroyed the Republic, and now the remnants of the Republic have formed a Rebellion (oh, excuse me, Resistance) and are fighting back. Hmmmm. Where have I seen that story line before? They've literally just recreated the story line of the first three movies, updated slightly for the times (a female lead, a black guy with more lines than Lando). Can't they think up anything new? To be fair, I thought Rey and Finn (Daisy Ridley and John Boyega) were the only bright parts of TFA. I thought they were great. And yes there are a few plot twists that weren't in the first trilogy, but the overall arc is still the same so far (I'll offer odds that the third new movie doesn't revolve around trying to redeem Kylo Ren in order to thwart the New Order).

I mean, I get it. Why mess with a winning formula? They introduce Star Wars to lots of new young people while providing the nostalgia that all the older fans crave (that they didn't get from Jar Jar). They'll make grotesque amounts of money and everyone will acclaim Disney and the writers/directors as a bunch of geniuses. But it won't mean they are good movies. Just look at the Transformers franchise. It has made crazy amounts of cash, and those movies make so little sense that our national IQ drops every time a new one comes out.

Anyway, seeing your review, I just had to vent/let you know you're not alone. I'm not bitter or anything.

Cheers. And keep up the good work.

Chris N

1/1/2018 07:52:50 pm

I was ok with it in the beginning, not great but decent... but as I've thought about it more, the final space scene with the use of ship transitioning to hyperspace as a weapon has really started to ruin it for me. At first I thought it was clever, but as I think more about it, it literally makes the entire story of star wars completely obsolete and not possible to happen. No empire could ever exist and no fleet could ever come about.... as soon as that happens then simply bombard them with hyperspace ships and it'd be destroyed. The movie shows that shields can't stop it and it can destroy entire fleets.

First, some assumptions on it:
-this seems possible as a weapon as the ship transitions into hyperspace from real space. Likely means there's some limited range on it.
-any range issues could be taken care off by one ship dropping out of hyperspace on the edge of it's target, then immediately jumping back to hyperspace into the target and becoming a weapon. If there's some issue with jumping twice quickly (can't remember if there is), then that can easily be handled by the weapon having two hyperspace engines or two components with an initial ship and a second part that separates.
-this ability to jump to the edge of target space then ignite the weapon means that it's a weapon that is practically impossible to stop. If there's a really large fleet simply bombard in cascading intervals, moving closer and closer to destroying the center. A fleet wouldn't be able to defend because the weapon could be jumped from a safe distance to it's limit of range and would then be able to immediately fire.
-it can be fully automated with a droid since we've seen droids put ships into hyperspace many times (so no need for suicide attack).
-no ship level shields can stop it. Maybe some planet scale ones could, but then you keep bombarding them and would likely eventually destroy it. Ships with hyperspace capability are common and cheap, would be easy to bombard a protective fleet to destroy them, then send thousands against an isolated base. If for some reason the gravity well stopped the weapon (which no real reason to think that in this universe I believe), then it wouldn't be hard to isolate a base, bombard surrounding areas with conventional weapons, and then blockade the base so that no support could get to them, and starve them out. You wouldn't have to actually have ships in orbit to do this so no vulnerability there. Just have some observing ships hidden and quickly jump ships/hyperspace weapons into space as soon as relieve came.

A weapons like that means the very first space battle in Episode IV never should have happened, just bombard it with a hyperspace weapon. The Death Star didn't have to be destroyed by a missile in the core, simply bombard it with hyperspace weapons... Darth Vader and the Empire are murdering everyone, then do a sneak attack with a hyperspace weapon and bombard their ship, or even just the plant they're on. No reason for a Death Star to begin with.

And you can't tell me know one had thought of it before. Parts of the Star Wars universe have been at war for thousands of years. It would have happened prior at some point. Someone would have thought of it. If there is a defense against it then it'd be so expensive and uncommon (i.e. planet level amounts of energy), that it couldn't be easily used. This means wars with fleet scale battles could never happen and literally the entire Star Wars story line could never have come about... sigh...

impossibru

2/1/2018 12:24:09 am

IMPOSSIBRU
IMPOSSIBRU
IMPOSSIBRU
YEAH!

IMPOSSIBRU

2/1/2018 12:27:17 am

IMPOSSIBRU!!

Shitshitzo

2/1/2018 01:38:37 am

Fuck yo WillWight to Hel

In which we ramble on.
And by we, I mean me.